The Hammer

For the first time in more than 6th months there is something positive to report.

My kids are learning something. Not only are they learning something, I have dropped the Hammer on them. It is great. 

If there is one thing that I have been struggling with since being a teacher, it is the fact that I can't discipline a single soul. This does not bode well when you consider that the only difference between my children and individuals of the California State penal system are a couple of years, a few counts of man slaughter, and the occasional tear drop tattoo. 

For the majority of the entire last semester my students went ape sheet. 

With a teacher who granted such liberties as speaking in class without raising your hand, standing up and using a pencil sharpener without asking, and putting on your makeup while your teacher lectures, the students were finding it hard to stay on task. As the semester progressed, we had a couple more incidents. Studnts began to start walking in and out of class, inviting their friends to class, running around the school unattended, and occasionally bringing a camalback full of Vodka in the classroom.  

Things have changed this semester. Mr. Evans has been inspired by a couple of things. First Mr. Evans saw this YouTube Video Kudos Jamison Sheffer

I thought this was pretty funny and wasn't really effective, so I didn't do it. Then I met the real life, female, dread-lock version of this man. Her name is Mama Payne and she brought the mother freaking hammer. 

Not a real picture of Mama Payne

The first time that I observed Mama Payne throw down the hammer I crapped my pants. Some kid was chewing gum in her classroom and she lost her freaking religion. How do I know that she lost her religion? She told me, the rest of the class, and most certainly the kid chewing gum that she had lost it. All the fury and might that a sixty year old black woman could muster came out on this one kid. Within five minutes the entire classroom was silent. At the end of this and everyone of her rants Mama Payne asks the student "Are you gonna make me bring the Payne?"  Without question the student replies with a "no" 

"No... No What?" replies Mama Payne

Following this, the student replies with a "No Mama Payne please don't bring the Payne" each and every time. 

As time has progressed I have started copying what Mama Payne says. I don't have a cool way to threaten children with my last name, but I do my best to sound like a sixty year old black woman and it usually does the trick.

Anyway my classroom is a much happier place when I "Bring the Payne." 

until   

next time 

Going Ape Sheet so my children don't have to. 

Merry Christmas

I delivered goodies to my students today. Most of them were gone. I managed to catch one home and I gave a bag of goodies to another one's cousin. I must have gone by six or seven houses. When I say houses, I mean project apartments and crowded tenements.  There was a family of eight that were living in a one room apartment. The other students house was an orphanage. I was grateful to be in circumstances that are not that poor. I am glad to be in a situation where I have that which I need and that which I want.
Merry Christmas faithful readers and to all

a good night.

Backpacks

So the primary reason why I joined Teach for America was because I wanted to influence my students for good. I thought that once they saw a successful, goodlooking, and cool guy like myself they would for sure start listening to me and leave the hood for good. You would never believe how surprised I was when after a week my students didn't start performing well on their tests. I thought that soon enough they would come around.
However, as time has progressed I haven't seen much change for the better from them. In fact, that first week, I didn't really realize how low my kids were and how low my expectations should be. (They don't put them in SDC for nothing you know). For instance, I left for a training one day and when I came back I received the following note.

If your wondering if that is really what it says... the answer is yes.

If you are thinking "well the sub means that they were smoking weed outside"  you are wrong.

If you are wondering how they smoked weed in my class I will tell you.




My dear friends named in the aforementioned picture were not dumb enough to toke up a blunt in the back of class. Nope, no way. My little ingenue-rs concocted a far less obvious way of smoking weed. The two took turns lighting marijuana in Jose's backpack, sticking his head in the backpack and then having the other zip up the backpack to make sure that they would not miss out on collecting that purple haze.  From all reports, both student and teacher it appears the two got away with two turns each before the substitute realized that two individuals could actually be stupid enough to smoke marijuana in class.
 I wonder if they were like "This idea is so good that it has to work!"

Anyway, if this teaching thing doesn't work out I think I am going to go into business. I have a pretty great idea.


                                       Introducing

                                                        "The Bongpack"
Avaliable in
Ganja Green

   Purple HAZE

and      Hemp

 This idea is so good that it has to work!

Weed and Harmony

ROJO

The problem with women

What's up with people who think babies are cute?   I mean the occasional ethnic baby is alright but when it really comes down to it, there are a lot of babies that just creep the crap out of me.

I dot get women who think that babies are cute and are the end all be all of the world. For instance, I was texting a girl for a little while. I kind of liked her, because she was a model, but I kind of didn't, because she was a model. Anyway she showed me the following picture of a baby with the following explanation.

 

I then responded with the following text.

Now I am not my uncle Gene. let's be honest everybody, I neither believe that that baby was cute or even like babies, but what was I suppossed to say?

After taking one look at what I thought was the spawn of ET and Boy George, I wanted to say that it was hideous but I just responded with a false exclamation of admiration for babies.

I have the perfect text next time

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anyway ladies here are some uglybaby= cute baby comparisons

 

 

.

 

Those were the ugly ones

 

here are the cute ones

 

 

Ladies if we get married I can promise you that the kid that you have with me will look like the last one, study like the seond to last, and experience as much persecution as the third to last one.

 

 

 

Blind Leading the Blind

I never really knew how ADHD I was until I looked at my kids. I really didn't. I had an idea that I may have had some issues, but I never realized how deep my issues ran. Its a harsh wakeup call really.

Having students with the same disability that you have is like looking into a mirror. A very disorganized, unkempt, and absent minded mirror. My kids knod off, make strange noises, say dumb things, and always forget their materials. Most other teachers don't put up with their crap. I try to discipline my kids, but it is kind of difficult when they are doing the exact same thing that you do. Its hard to fail a kid for not bringing a pen when the record for the longest time you have had a pen is for three days.
I recently went to a workshop that talked about the importance of teaching children to be organized. Among the various concepts that were taught were color coding, binder collection, and backpack cleanliness. After the hour and a half lecture on teaching ADHD children to be organized, I began to stop paying attention (surprising I know). I started to surf the web and I found this picture

blind leading other blind,
until next time.
Rojo 

a depressing statement

You may be wondering, where the heck I have been for about a month and a half. You may be thinking, "man that last post about Curious George Lopez was so damn funny, what the heck happened to Rom? He was on a roll." You may be wondering that, but in all honesty, you probably haven't wondered that. I'd like to think that people adored my blog enough to say this; unfortunately, I think that people read my blog about as much as I read other blogs. That is to say very rarely.
  The comedy of my job has began to wear thin. For almost a month and a half I was entertained by the follies and the faults of my students. It is hard to explain how I felt at the time that I started to teach. I was entertained, but saddened by the foolish responses of my students. I used their responses as fodder for my blog. This was not a malacisious and ill spirited attempt to get a laugh. More so, I beleived that there was power to comedy. In fact I still believe that there is power to comedy. I think humor is nothing more than the truth revealed in an uplifting manner and I belief that many times it is far more poignent than drama. I believed, then, and I still beleive now that my blog presented the pathetic world that was and is my students lives. I was able to laugh at how pathetic their responses were and I was able to try and help these kids as much as possible.
   As time has progressed, seeing my students failing has turned from an enjoyable pasttime to a frustrating reality.  I cannot explain how upsetting it is to see your students fail time and time again. I cannot express how disheartening it is to prepare a lesson for an hour and a half, only to have it go over the heads of all of my students. It is hurtful it is frustrating. I joined Teach For America becuase I truly believed that I have the skill sets to change the lives of my students. I suppose in a way I still believe that. Every evening I start my lesson plans believing my students are going to get something out of the lesson that I have tauhgt them. Every morning I am filled with a hope that the day will be different than the last.  Thus far my hope has provided no substance. No marked change has transpired within the lives of my children. No reading growth. No analytical enrichment, and certainly no increase in rhetoric.
   Students still believe that Barak Obama is the person who makes all of the laws in the United States. They hold fast to the notion that Maximllion Robpspierre was Frances first millioniare, and the still believe that a democracy is Curious George Lopez.
   I cannot tell you what I am accomplishing. I don't know if any lives have changed because of me. I am quite certain that anyone else could do as good or perhaps better a job than me at teaching these children. I don't know why I am doing any of this. I really don't. I couldn't tell you what I have accomplished, the only thing that I know is that I am suppossed to be here. I wish that it wasn't this way but it is. 
 

Panther Pride

Schools throughout the world show their pride differently.
For some schools, like my alma Matter Redlands High School they choose to show their pride through time honored traditions. As a result they do rediculous things such as have our graduation at the Redlands Bowl, an outdoor venue filled with an antiquated wooden benches that make the three hour procession all the more memorable.
   For others, pride is shown through excellence in academics. In La Canada, Loma Linda, and other regions heavily populated with Asian Americans, students give their all to getting striaght A's. This creates a culture of learning and again a culture of pride.
   There are also schools that take pride in athletics. Riverside Poly, for instance is a school that has produced dozens of hall of famer's such as  Reggie and Cheryl Miller, Sippy Woodhead, Barry, and Bobby Bonds. They show their might and pride on the gridiron, in the pool, and on the court.
  But what happens when you have no time honored traditions? What happens when your school lacks academic success? What happens when there is a dirth of athletic achievement? How does your school show their spirit? How does your school show your pride?
Well here at West Adams let me show you how we show our pride.


(Please Mute Your Speakers before you press play)

 Fighting

     and I dare say we are pretty darn good at what we do.

Here is my personal favorite



How did I find out about this? Well of course teaching SDC allows me to teach some of the most proud panthers in the entire school.  In fact the kid with the cast in the second video is one of my students.

until next time
Mr. E
Fighting for my kids
in SDC.